It was too late to turn back now. The plane would be landing in Tucson Arizona in a matter of minutes. What will he say? Does this mean we could be getting back together? What if he brought me here to kill me and dispose of my body? Those were all questions that ran through my mind during my four hour flight from Virginia. I got off the plane and went to claim my bag. There he was, looking just as afraid as I felt. He didn't smile. He just gave me a hug. My husband could be quiet but this was odd. I asked him was everything ok and did he change his mind. He told me that he was just in "serious mode".
As we walked to my car my husband tells me that he has a lot to tell me. He tells me that the Marriage retreat isn't in Tucson but in another city a couple of hours away. That revelation made me nervous. My family and friends were under the impression that I would be in Tucson for the weekend. I prayed and relaxed as my husband drove down the highway. It felt good being with him. He tells me that he has done a lot of things that he wasn't proud of in the last year. He tells me that he was trying to find himself but ended up falling flat on his face. He tells me that he realized that I was the one for him all along.
We arrive at a beautiful hotel and check in. There are signs posted for Marriage Retreat goers to meet in a couple of hours in a special room. The first night of the retreat was amazing. All of the couples were given a Nickname. We played a "Newly Wed" type game to determine which couple knows each other best and me and my husband won! At this point I was thinking, "Wow, we really are meant for each other." After the game the pastor prepared us for a weekend of breakthrough and healing. He encouraged the couples to stay the course when things would get rough over the weekend. We ended the night and retreated to our room.
Me and my husband stayed up and talked. I asked him about all of the things he wanted to tell me. He confessed to me that he had several affairs. He told me that one of the women claimed to be pregnant. I was devastated. I told me that he hadn't communicated with any of the women in over a month. He told me that the woman who claimed to be pregnant also claimed to have gotten an abortion. I wasn't sure what to think, or believe. The only thing I knew was that if there was a woman carrying his child, that was a deal breaker for me. He even confessed that one woman who communicated with me via email a year before the retreat was someone he did in fact have an affair with. (See Nobody's Private Investigator for full story) The year before the retreat he lied to me about cheating with this woman along with another woman on a deployment. I was hurt. I told him that I was ready to hear the truth and willing to forgive but it was hard hearing all of this at once. Needless to say, night one of this marriage retreat was a rollercoaster. I was devastated and ready to go back to Virginia! What could this pastor possibly say to me tomorrow to change my mind? The year before my husband made me think I was absolutely crazy for believing that he had an affair with this woman. I found suspicious emails between them not long after I found out about the first affair that I knew of.
I called the pastors wife and told her that I was going to leave the retreat early. I thanked her for he kindness but told her should would not see me there the next day. She encouraged me to sleep on it. She spoke as if she had been through this many times. She said tomorrow would be much better for me and that her husband would get into the biblical teaching in the morning. I was tired. Against all of my friends and family telling me not to fly to Arizona for this Marriage Retreat, I went; for this?
Evening passed, morning came and it was the second day of the retreat...
As we walked to my car my husband tells me that he has a lot to tell me. He tells me that the Marriage retreat isn't in Tucson but in another city a couple of hours away. That revelation made me nervous. My family and friends were under the impression that I would be in Tucson for the weekend. I prayed and relaxed as my husband drove down the highway. It felt good being with him. He tells me that he has done a lot of things that he wasn't proud of in the last year. He tells me that he was trying to find himself but ended up falling flat on his face. He tells me that he realized that I was the one for him all along.
We arrive at a beautiful hotel and check in. There are signs posted for Marriage Retreat goers to meet in a couple of hours in a special room. The first night of the retreat was amazing. All of the couples were given a Nickname. We played a "Newly Wed" type game to determine which couple knows each other best and me and my husband won! At this point I was thinking, "Wow, we really are meant for each other." After the game the pastor prepared us for a weekend of breakthrough and healing. He encouraged the couples to stay the course when things would get rough over the weekend. We ended the night and retreated to our room.
Me and my husband stayed up and talked. I asked him about all of the things he wanted to tell me. He confessed to me that he had several affairs. He told me that one of the women claimed to be pregnant. I was devastated. I told me that he hadn't communicated with any of the women in over a month. He told me that the woman who claimed to be pregnant also claimed to have gotten an abortion. I wasn't sure what to think, or believe. The only thing I knew was that if there was a woman carrying his child, that was a deal breaker for me. He even confessed that one woman who communicated with me via email a year before the retreat was someone he did in fact have an affair with. (See Nobody's Private Investigator for full story) The year before the retreat he lied to me about cheating with this woman along with another woman on a deployment. I was hurt. I told him that I was ready to hear the truth and willing to forgive but it was hard hearing all of this at once. Needless to say, night one of this marriage retreat was a rollercoaster. I was devastated and ready to go back to Virginia! What could this pastor possibly say to me tomorrow to change my mind? The year before my husband made me think I was absolutely crazy for believing that he had an affair with this woman. I found suspicious emails between them not long after I found out about the first affair that I knew of.
I called the pastors wife and told her that I was going to leave the retreat early. I thanked her for he kindness but told her should would not see me there the next day. She encouraged me to sleep on it. She spoke as if she had been through this many times. She said tomorrow would be much better for me and that her husband would get into the biblical teaching in the morning. I was tired. Against all of my friends and family telling me not to fly to Arizona for this Marriage Retreat, I went; for this?
Evening passed, morning came and it was the second day of the retreat...
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